When people feel comfortable being on their own or have a small tight circle of friends, that means that they are what we call loners. People, unfortunately, see such people as folks who are lonely and battle with dark moods. But this is a wrong assumption as that is far from the case. In fact, loners hardly ever feel lonely. They enjoy their own company and the time they spend together is often filled with a lot of thinking or reflection.
They do cherish their private time – something a lot of people are scared of. This is due to the fact that spending some time with yourself opens the door to having time to reflect your life’s directions and face the demons that are the vane of your existence. Many would rather not do that but would instead drown those voices and thoughts with the roar of friends at functions and events. For the loners, they do this on a daily basis so much so that they master the art of reflecting on one’s actions and his reactions to the events of life. This makes them very self-aware and self-conscious people.
This makes them not the best type of people to be friends with especially if you demand to always almost be in the company of your friend. They are also known to be very selective of the types of people that they associate with and often the criteria for entry is based on the values and goals that the loner holds dear.
You may be asking ‘what other traits are associated with these kinds of people?’ Well, keep reading to find out.
A loner is known to have stiff standards. They would always encourage and show that firm and reasonable boundaries are important for a very long and healthy relationship. And they would always keep to that philosophy.
That isn’t just one-sided as they also tend to respect and acknowledge other people’s boundaries too. They also will tell you if you are breaking your own boundaries. They truly believe that if you can’t respect your own rules then it would be impossible to respect that of others.
The loner can be one of the most emotionally and psychologically balanced individuals. They are the kinds of folks who don’t need the attention to feel good about themselves. They would instead be more concerned about the character of an individual. When they make friends with someone, they tend to stay loyal to them. It is very common to see people who say that the quietest of their friends end up to be the only ones by their side in the time of need.
They understand what it means to have a friend indeed. If they have found you worthy of being in their company of small friends, then they would do all that is within their power to help and support you. This is the case for all relationships be it family, friends or even at the office.
Keeps an Open Mind:
This may seem very different from what you would expect from a loner. At least that is the case for many people who think of a loner as some obstinate, close-minded, brooding asshole. But that, of course, is a far cry from the fact. Although that loner definitely do enjoy having some time to themselves, they do also realize that they don’t know everything. That is the first step to wisdom, and turning open-mindedness. They are very much inclined to new adventures and strange activities. Apart from the obvious fun advantage that comes with indulging in these activities, they gain knowledge which they constantly need to fill the yearn that they have for improvement and consistent self-development.
Although they love to engage in all these, they would make sure that they have done their homework as it regards those who they have to share these experiences with. To them it all about their natural tendency to stick with a small crowd.
The loners are very level-headed people. They have come to or achieved a very high level of self-awareness that has been possible because of the hours and hours that they have spent in self-reflection. They know what stuff they are made of and would know how they react under stress or pressure and how they should react under pressure – remember that these are two different things. That makes them better prepared for times of adversity and turmoil. And we often find them coast through all those troubled times.
This doesn’t mean that they never feel afraid of getting stressed whenever they are under pressure. But due to their great and intense focus on whatever it is that they are doing, they learn to avoid unnecessary complaining and instead focus on trying to solve the problems that befall them.
They are also known to take time outs when they retreat to themselves and critically critic and modify their actions or decision-making process.
That is one thing that is truly a characteristic of loners – they are self-aware. They know who they are and what they are capable of doing. Although it is a gift that is coveted by a lot of people, it takes a lot of hard work to get there. It also means that the said individual faces who he/she truly is. That may not be very palatable to him/her, but that is what the loner usually faces every day. A true representation of who they truly are. They aren’t afraid of seeing their own flaws but are more interested in pointing them out and focusing on making amends that would spur more growth.
And due to this conscious effort in trying to understand themselves, loners are very self-aware people. That also helps them to read their environments better and make wise decisions or take potent actions towards their own advancement. Times of pressure and stress are just stress situations that help them test the constant changing theories of themselves. They always come out of such storms of life better than they were going into them.
They Value Time:
Loners are very conscious of the time. They are very driven and ambitious people and therefore know that all their efforts are built on the platform of time. So they would always be conscious of time stealers such as unnecessary buddy banter and fake people who are very good at emotionally manipulating those who are around them. Loners can spot such people and throw them out of their lives before they have any chance of derailing them from their goals.
When it comes to their work ethic, they are known for their ability to keep to time, they are always on time and wouldn’t take actions that would make them waste other people’s time.
They Know No One is Perfect:
Loners – due to a healthy understanding of themselves, know that no one was perfect. From their constant pruning of their negative tendencies, they know that everyone has his/her demons. So they are very reluctant to criticize and even when they do, it is out of a need to stop whatever behavior that is a clog in the wheel of progress.
Instead of constantly criticising others, loners would prefer to focus more on themselves. They would always focus on the things that they can control. With their heart and intuition leading the way, loners would do what’s best for ten and their communities.
Another strong characteristic of a loner is that is that they are very empathetic people. They are very good at understanding the problems that people go through, and also go another level deep to get a feel of how the victim views and feels about the problem. This gives them the ability to not only find solutions to the victim’s problems, but also have these solutions tailored to the uniqueness of such victims.
Their ability to be emotionally stable helps them to deal with other people’s problems – remember that they are very good when they are under pressure.