If there is anyone or anything that is absolutely terrible for us no questions asked, it is narcissistic people. I have always maintained that narcissistic people are the single most terrible things ever to enter a person’s life because they are typically cancers. Narcissists are cancers to the minds of their victims. They act like normal cancer, undetectable at first and then quickly multiplying their control over your mind until they have a strong foothold on your mind. In this case, therapy sometimes may not be able to get through to someone who is this far gone under the hold of a narcissistic person. They continue eating into the person’s mind until it has reached a critical stage and that person is literally a shadow of themselves. Then if you are lucky, you escape from them and start the slow, painful and long recovery to normalcy you would always have a scar, a remembrance of what you have survived. On the other hand, if you aren’t lucky, the cancer would totally take over your mind until you become a slave to it, just waiting for your demise.
Narcissists are very good manipulators. Their manipulation level ranks up there with that of sociopaths and psychopaths. What makes a narcissist very dangerous is their total lack of empathy and love for anyone other than themselves. And that is a terrible character trait on its own without adding the fact that that they would do anything it takes, moral or not, legal or not to make sure that they get what they want for themselves. They are highly selfish. A more selfish person has never existed. They only care about themselves and would only consider their own wants and needs above all else, and if their decision would benefit them and hurt you badly in the process, they wouldn’t think twice about making that decision and going ahead with it. They are obsessed with the need to be in positions of power and also hardworking enough to usually get there, and in the event that hard work would not get them there, they would scheme, cheat and manipulate anyone to get them there.
You should know very well just how manipulative a people you have ever had the displeasure of being in a relationship with them or having any dealings with them. If you haven’t ever had the bad luck of being in a relationship with a narcissistic person, then you need to read below to know 7 sights that would quickly out them as narcissists no matter how well they try to conceal it. These signs would clearly show 7 different ways through which narcissists manipulate their victims with.
1. THEY LOVE ASSUMING THE “LITTLE POOR ME” PERSONA
Please don’t get deceived by this attitude; it is a ploy to get you to do something for them. They are very good at playing on the empathy and sympathy of other people for a group that does not feel empathy. They know how the normal human beings mind works. We are more likely to do things for someone if we feel sympathetic to their plight. In our own way, we want to alleviate their suffering by doing that one thing for them because people deserve good things especially when they have had a long list of bad luck. The narcissist knows this, and so he tries to gain our sympathy by telling us some sort of sob story and acting like the victim. They also use this victim persona as an excuse to weasel out of their wrongdoing.
2. THEY ARE AGGRESSIVE AND INTIMIDATING
Narcissists get a rush from intimidating other people. Nothing is more invigorating to them than putting and seeing the fear in the eyes of someone else. They are usually very subtle in their abuse and also in their threats. They give nonverbal, vague but not less terrifying threats to keep you in line. They would assume total control of your life and would totally control your emotions and your psyche. For instance, they might intimidate you by withholding attention from you for doing something they did not like. They also love to shred a person’s self-esteem, and they use it as an intimidation tactic.
3. THEY CONSTANTLY MAKE YOUR ACHIEVEMENT SEEM LESS
Narcissistic people love to be the most superior person in any relationship and would not accept anything other than that. If they feel that your achievements and successes want to make you feel better about yourself, they quickly destroy that by degrading your achievements and telling you stories about how much more they have. They take a lot of pleasure in spoiling any sort of pleasure you might feel because of your achievement.
4. THEY PROJECT THEIR OWN FEELINGS ON YOU
A narcissistic person is never wrong, and neither is he or she to be blamed for their actions. It must have been your fault they flew into a rage because you told them you didn’t like something they did. Couldn’t you just endure it silently? Why did you talk? If you hadn’t, he wouldn’t have gotten angry. No matter what happens and even when it’s clear to a blind man that they are to blame, they somehow turn the tables around. For instance, you might confront your narcissistic partner over something that he did which you did not appreciate and while you are talking he acts all disinterested or he shows visible signs of anger. And then at the end of your spiel, he either denies any knowledge of what you described, he ignores you or flat out refuses to have any conversation about that particular topic and when you ask him again, and he ignores you, you feel frustrated, and by then they are shouting. The narcissistic person then asks you why you are shouting and making it seem like you are the crazy one.
5. NARCISSISTIC PEOPLE LOVE TO TALK ABOUT THEMSELVES
What do you expect from someone who is in love or who loves someone? Of course, they would be excited to always talk about the object of their affection. Narcissistic people are the same because they are obsessively in love with themselves so it goes to say that they would love to talk about themselves all the time. Watch out for someone who loves to talk about themselves. If you somehow get a small opening to discuss something else, they would somehow remember an incident in their lives that happen to have something to do with the new topic. They always talk about themselves, and you can see how frustrating that would be if you are in a relationship with a guy that you can’t talk to because he spends all the time trying to convince you that he is so awesome, and you are very lucky.
6. THEY ARE GOOD AT UNBALANCING THEIR VICTIMS LIVES AND MINDS.
Narcissistic people figure that if they keep you unbalanced, you would not be able to tell where they are hiding from emotionally speaking. They would even go as far as bringing in a third party to spice things up while they stand in the background seemingly innocent but watching you unravel. This is called the triangulation technique. This mind game is always very effective because the other person would be there to corroborate the narcissist’s own story leaving you fighting two people which would definitely drain you out faster than possible. At the end of the day, they do not suffer any consequences.
7. ONCE A NARCISSISTIC PERSON, ALWAYS A NARCISSISTIC PERSON.
Change is so not in the offering for these people. Narcissistic people never ever change, and you can take that to the bank. Whatever plans to prove to you that they have changed is a big fat ploy meant to take you in, use you and destroy your life. They would always be the manipulative, selfish, people that they are until they breathe their last. You might say can’t therapy change or do something for them. The thing is that no amount of therapy can make a person feel bad about something that they are convinced was not bad. Yep, that’s how terrible narcissistic people are. They don’t care about you, you were just another face in the long line of faces that have crossed their lives, and when you leave, they would quickly pick someone else.
The seven sighs above are classical ways that narcissistic people use to emotionally and psychologically manipulate their partners. From acting like the victim to projecting their feelings on you to messing up with your mind, these people are really horrible to be with. If you know that your partner is a narcissist from the behavior they exhibit such as never taking the blame for their actions, always feeling superior and expecting to be treated specially, loving only themselves and displaying a shocking amount of selfishness, then you should watch her out for these 7 ways listed above. Although, my candid advice to you would be to leave without notifying him at all because they are very good at manipulating their partners into staying with them.