“Forever young, I want to be forever young,” are the lyrics to a song by Jay Z and Mr. Hudson. This line from the chorus sums up what most of us feel. We all want to be forever young, and it is more apparent in the number of older people resorting to botox shots and other means to look as young as possible. But what is it about youth that makes it such an aphrodisiac? I think that it is the freedom to make mistakes, the right to live life on your own terms before you begin to live them on someone else’s. Youth is the time to make mistakes and laugh about it, the time to not cares about responsibilities; it’s a time to be fun, have fun and look your best.
Everybody begins to feel their age at different times. Some people begin to notice how much time has flown when they hit the big 30. For the women, the sound of their biological clocks gets louder and louder while for the men, the awareness comes that they need to settle down and have a family.
However, none of this is compared to the dreaded midlife crisis. We hear of midlife crisis a lot of times and mostly what we hear is about one symptom or a couple of symptoms of it but what really is the midlife crisis?
Wikipedia sums it up perfectly for us in this definition “A midlife crisis is a transition of identity and self-confidence that can occur in middle-aged individuals, typically 45–64 years old. The phenomenon is described as a psychological crisis brought about by events that highlight a person’s growing age, inevitable mortality, and possible shortcomings of accomplishments in life. This may produce feelings of depression, remorse, and anxiety, or the desire to achieve youthfulness or make drastic changes to current lifestyle.”
The midlife crisis is something that we all have come to expect in our lives. The women expect the midlife crises more. The midlife crisis hits everyone differently, and the symptoms come differently too. It doesn’t just manifest with the man running off with a younger woman more than half his age in a bid to recover his age while leaving his wife and kids. Some people might just be in a funky mood for a while, and that’s it, and some others just seem to want to make themselves look a whole lot younger by fixing up their boobs and getting other transplants. While the symptoms do vary widely, there is a general feeling of fear that we haven’t really enjoyed life or that we need to recapture our youths. Either way, the midlife crisis is a thing, and it does hit most people when they step into their 40’s and can last up until their 60’s.
The midlife crisis is a period in a person’s life that comes with a lot of changes and new things. For most of the women, menopause now is at the door, and in addition to this, the empty feeling and the visible aging of friends becomes a daily stressful reminder that your time is gone. That you have officially joined the middle-aged group all of these is more than enough to bring the midlife crises to anybody’s door.
Some people actually don’t know when they are suffering from a midlife crisis and that is because they don’t know the wide range of symptoms that can come with the midlife crisis. In this article today, we would be looking at about 13 symptoms that herald the coming of the midlife crisis. Here they are.
1. YOUR THOUGHTS LEAN TOWARDS THE DEEP AND VERY INTROSPECTIVE.
This is perhaps one of the first signs of the midlife crisis. Introspective thinking. You begin to deeply think about your life and your life choices to find out if you actually messed up or if you at least for halfway to where you have always wanted to be. This is the time when you think about all the starry-eyed dreams you had as a teenager as well as revisit those dreams that you shelved in your twenties. You think about all the freedom and happiness you had and all of a sudden, you want it back. You want to have that fun and exciting life again even though you have responsibilities. You want to ditch them and go out to have one impulsive day of fun just like you used to do when you were younger. So, if you are having a lot of deep thoughts then it just makes it possible that you are hitting or have hit your midlife crisis stage. Don’t go out and do something that you would regret much later after the midlife crisis has gone its merry way to find another victim. Here’s why I said this. The British Psychology Society has prescribed a healthy dose of focusing and creativity to be the perfect drugs to combat the midlife crisis.
2. YOU BEGIN TO MAKE VERY IMPULSIVE DECISIONS JUST LIKE YOU USED TO DO WHEN YOU WERE YOUNGER.
This is another case of trying to get back into your young groove. When you were younger, you had the freedom to make very impulsive decisions without expecting to hurt people or shirking too many responsibilities, but now, you can hardly go to anywhere by yourself without telling your family where you are going in case of an emergency. Now, making all these impulsive and not well thought out decisions is just your mind trying to regain it’s youth and helping you to feel as young as ever.
3. YOU FEEL VERY DIFFERENT AND ALMOST TOO FRAZZLED AND CONFUSED.
This is a sign that is mostly experienced by the women, and that is heavily due to Menopause. Menopause is a period in a woman’s life where she stops having a period. It is usually diagnosed when she has not had a period for about a full year. The Woman undergoes a whole range of changes when menopause comes knocking. A lot of them are due to the change in the hormone estrogen. Some of the symptoms are hot flashes, trouble sleeping, lower energy and mood changes.
This can make them feel very emotional and a bit too stressed out. It is advised that a woman going through these changes and symptoms should visit a doctor to help them successfully navigate through this time of their lives.
4. SUDDENLY A FULL NIGHTS SLEEP BECOMES HISTORY.
This is also mostly associated with women and the onset of their menopause. The menopause as I said before is a time when a woman stops having a period for a full year. It comes with a lot of changes and adjustments mostly because of the reduction in the production of the hormone estrogen. One of those changes which also doubles as a symptom of this is the lack of a good night’s sleep. You might feel like you are going haywire because sometimes at night, you wake up with no explanations and you can’t go back to sleep. This mild form of insomnia is another thing to look forward to during a midlife crisis, and it is usually caused by the lower levels of estrogen in the body of the woman. (1)
5. THE FUTURE HAS NO APPEAL TO YOU ANYMORE
With midlife crisis comes a sort of lapse in your life. It seems as if everything is in slow motion and you are in a vacuum. That feeling can be hard to actually understand and process. Because of that a lot of people react with negative emotions such as anger, fear, and irritation. Things don’t seem as exciting as they used to be before.
The thought of a new day does not come with any new feelings, and you don’t look forward to it anymore. Your life routing venues even more glaringly clear to you and you see nothing bright in the days and even months to come. This can bring in depression, so you try to make little goals and keep them to make sure that you are occupied.
6. YOU FEEL AS IF YOU ARE STUCK IN TIME, NOT MOVING FORWARD AT ALL.
This is one of the more common symptoms. Boredom. It seems as if with your kids growing up and starting out life on their own, you are left with nobody to care for and nobody to really share your day with. There is a sense of purpose that comes with being a parent with kids that are in the house. You have to cook dinner, go shopping for their needs and just generally take care of them. But when they have all flown the coop, you begin to feel this crushing boredom. There is no one to cook for except you and lost times; you may not even cook anymore. The days go even slower than ever, and soon you have the feeling of being in water or moving in limbo.
7. YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE MISSING SOMETHING IMPORTANT IN YOUR LIFE
The truth is that you really aren’t missing anything. Well, nothing except a sense of purpose. You don’t really have a lot of things to do now that most if not all of all your children have left the house. Another major contributor to your lack of purpose is that all the dreams and goals you had have been met, and you don’t know what to do with yourself anymore. All of this just comes together to make you feel like you have lost something of importance to you. You really haven’t. You just lost your sense of purpose.
8. YOUR PHYSICAL APPEARANCE BEGINS TO WORRY YOU A LOT.
This is a part of the midlife crisis that messes with your mind because, in addition to wanting to re-live your youth, you also feel an overwhelming need also to look like you did when you were younger, and this includes paying a lot of attention to your appearance. Cue getting new clothes, a new style, trying new hairstyles, trying makeup and the things that the younger generation is doing. You are basically pursuing your youth physical appearance wise. (1)
9. YOU STOP CARING ABOUT HOW YOU LOOK.
This might sound a lot contradictory to the last point I made but when you understand that being a bit obsessed with looking younger comes from wanting to be younger, and not caring about your appearance comes from being depressed, you would understand it better. Depression can come with a lot of nasty side effects, and one of them is the need to let your outsides match your insides, and this can be manifested by not taking care of yourself. So, letting yourself go can be a strong indicator of the midlife crisis brought on by depression.
10. IT SEEMS AS IF YOUR LIBIDO HAS TAKEN A DRASTIC TURN FOR THE WORSE.
Sex is a very important part of every relationship because it is a physical way of demonstrating love between each other. This particular symptom is mostly experienced by women because when they hit menopause, one of the changes that occur is a reduction in their sex drive. They don’t really like getting it on as much as they used to before. Also, they experience dryness in their vaginas, and that contributes to their lack of sex drive. There are remedies for that, and lube is one of them. So, instead of staying away entirely, you might want to get some lube.(1)
11. YOU FEEL POSITIVELY ANCIENT.
This is a major part of the midlife crisis and dare I say, the most important part of the midlife crises. What could be worse than feeling as if you are old and this feeling is what drives you to do a number of things in a bid to feel younger? There is always that sad and negative feeling that comes with growing old. You feel as though life is over for you after all old people don’t really have any fun or that is what you think. The results of some research showed that people who had a bad attitude toward their advancement in age experienced a negative change in their psychological health. Try to look at the good part of getting old. Everything has a good part to it.(1)
12. YOU FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO LOOK UP TO WOULD NEVER MEASURE UP TO THE FUN YOU HAD WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.
This type of thinking can bring on a depression very fast. Try not to think about you having lived your best years already. There might not be as much fun in the future as it was in the past mostly because you have attained the goals that you set for yourself many years ago and now it seems as if all you have to get ready for is dying. But it isn’t. There are lots of fun for the elderly; you just have to be willing to look for it. Think on the bright side of things, you now have freedom and can do anything that you want to do.
13. YOU FIGURE OUT THAT YOU ARE HAVING A MIDLIFE CRISIS.
Yes, you have figured it out. You are having a midlife crisis. The symptoms have been an outlined above and you ought to be experiencing one if not a couple of them. The first thing you need to realize is that you still have a good number of years left to do what you want. You have that freedom once again. The kids have left the house, and you have no one to really take care of except yourself, so do that. Take care of yourself. You can always start up a business like the owner of Kentucky Fried Chicken did at 71 years old. You are never too late to do all the things you have wanted to do. You are more mature now and would not make the rookie mistakes that the younger crowd would make in their pursuit of fun. So, yea you are going through a midlife crisis but ride it out. Squeeze out the most fun you can from it and talk to someone if you are having a much more difficult time of it.(1)
Growing old can be a scary thing to happen to someone because it in a way lets you know that your time on earth with your loved ones is quite limited. You feel a lot weaker and cannot do the things that you would have been able to do without sweating anymore. You undergo a lot of changes, most prominently to your physical appearance. It can be daunting to have all this time spread before you without really knowing how to enjoy it or make the most out of it. Just know that if you are going through a midlife crisis, you can actually try to get over it by combating the symptoms. Making a bucket list of the thing you would like to experience, and the things that you have always wanted to do but never really got around to doing might be of great help to you. Either way, enjoy the ride of life because each day comes only once.